Friday, January 2, 2009

Cake Day: An Interview with Danish Cowboy

Q: It's blizzarding outside. Do you want me to interview you for my blog?
A: (No response.)
Q: Great! What is cow cake made of?
A: Oh, it can be a number of different things depending on what ingredients are available, their market prices, what phase the moon is in and whether or not I had Cheerios or Lucky Charms for breakfast.
Q: So are there Cheerios in it?
A: The stuff we have now has peas, distiller's grain, sunflower screenings and maybe a few other goodies like molasses. We feed it so our cows get the necessary protein for their diet. Q: Distiller's grain? Does that mean the cows get intoxicated on it? Shouldn't we stick with Cheerios?
A: (Sideways glance.)
Q: Boy, you're fun tonight. Next question. How much do you feed?
A: We shoot for about four pounds per animal every other day during the cold winter months. We also feed chopped hay or roll out hay bales so that they get a total of 30 pounds of feed every day, sometimes 40 pounds if it's really cold out.
Q: Or if your wife whines that you aren't feeding these poor starving creatures enough?
A: Who's the rancher here?

Q: Where do you get the cake from?
A: Our local town has a feed mill, but we need to shop around for the best price. This last load of cake came all the way from Fargo, North Dakota.
Q: Fargo, like the movie? Aren't you worried about what's in the cake then? You betcha I am.
A: Well, the cows don't seem to mind this batch. Just like any other time they hear the diesel pick-up start, they come running to get their ration.

Q: Why did I only get pictures of them chasing the pick-up down and milling around, waiting for the distribution of the cake? Why didn't I get pictures of that cool scene of them all lined out behind the pick-up as cake is tossed on the ground? Why can't I have a video camera that captures their soft breathing and snorts, the crunch of their hooves on the snow? The kind of stuff that gives you a sense of purpose in the morning?
A: It might be because you insisted on tossing the cake out to them and then complaining about how it was such hard work.
Q: Oh.
A: It might also be because we had these two funny little characters with us who don't allow for much picture time. Overheard as the kids relaxed in the cake (aka over-sized rabbit pellets) truck: "This batch of cake sure tastes good. Must be that distiller's grain Dad was talking about."
So Long and Farewell,

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